The Brick Phone I Carry In My Pocket

CW: It hasn't been since my senior year in high school that I really had a cool phone.

I had this weird little Samsung deal that was about the size of a chicken nugget and it slid up to answer and dial. It was the coolest thing ever. It fit right into my pocket and I barely even knew it was there.

Everyone would come look at it and would do a double take--"whoa, how is that a phone?"
I can't lie. That was a major selling point for me. The 'wow' factor has always been important to me. It's not about being better than someone or anything. It was just about having something cool, something I liked playing with.

So, a few weeks back, I went ahead and got myself another phone that kinda had that same 'wow' factor. It's the HTC EVO 4G, one of a few phones that can boast the nation's fastest 4G service that I have no clue is any different from the 3G. My sister's friend has a friend that says the 4G network and branding is totally bogus. All I know is I was in DC the other weekend, had the 4G service and it was fucking amazing. Faster than a speeding bullet, it was.

While that was cool and whatnot, and the plan was absurdly easy, I got the phone for other reasons.

First, the thing is as big as a brick and it's all screen on the front. I could watch it as a TV. It's amazing. There are times that I wish I had my old Samsung phone--one of my friends called it the Egg Phone which was totally inaccurate: it was smaller than an egg.

Secondly, I got it for the kickstand.

I can hear you know. You're all like "whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?"
Yeah. It has a kickstand. It's totally not important in terms of how the phone works--I think it's neat to stand it up on my desk when I'm listening to Pandora or when I have it on my nightstand as an alarm clock--but it's important in that 'wow' factor. I'm carrying a mini-television/radio/computer in my trousers (if you get that reference, you win a dollar) that is so big, it requires a kickstand for viewing purposes.

Silly? Yes. But it sold me.

That being said, I think it's funny that phones are getting bigger. Or is it that computers are getting smaller and you can make phone calls from them? I have veritable cinderblock in my pocket that plays radio, checks my e-mail, can surf the internets, post on Facebook and Twitter at the same time and makes calls. And if I ever get into a tough spot in the wrong neighborhood, I could use it as a personal defense device by spiking it off of someone's melon.

My brick phone/TV/radio/computer/Facebooker/Twitterer should leave one hell of a dent.